rather
This afternoon i was advised by Juan Pepe that i was delinquent on my blog updates. I found the criticism fair, and now i'm bothering to post. I wasn't feeling that well last week, but i'm much better after a very stress-free three-day weekend. I'll be looking forward to the next three-day weekend coming next week though too. I was thinking about how i think a lot about how old i am and how old other people are. i suppose it's one of my preoccupations. The thing is I'm trying to figure out if it's close to being a prejudice. I don't really make an assumption of how a person should behave based upon their age. But i think that how often i'm surprised at peoples' age indicates that i am to some extent labeling people with ages and it's some kind of stereotype if i'm classifying them. So how do i let go of the assumption of age? or is it that i should stop associating certain characteristics with people of a particular age? is that the real problem? is it that i think people should be wild and idealistic when young and responsible and pragmatic once they've seasoned a bit? i suppose most true idealists remain so regardless of their age. or do they? is it bad to assume one way or another? how do you escape assumptions? is it just learned by a series of surprises? what do you think?
5 Comments:
I think that assumptions are rather unavoidable, rather like juicy rationalizations but usually without the sugar that accompanies such (that can't be just me).
I think you just have to be prepared that assumptions don't necessarily bear fruit. Actually, sometimes they kick you flat on your butt. But other times maybe they save your butt? Yeah.
that's a good call. and i know exactly what you mean about the rationalizations. i don't usually assume until i hear about people's doings much at all about them. it seems behavior gives way more reasonable expectations, but not everyone and not always.. so i guess it's just something to do while waiting for something better to think about.
I think, for myself at least, that when I make assumptions they're based on past experiences. I agree with Courtney that sometimes they can hurt you, and sometimes they can help you, but without them, where would you be?
I think it's wise to recognize that you ARE making an assumption and tread lightly until you know that assumption is correct, but if we had to start out each new relationship with someone making no assumptions whatsoever based on their age, class, culture, religion, etc - it'd be tough to know what to start off talking about.
For example, I wouldn't assume that a 15 yr old homeless kid would laugh at a joke about Dadaism, and I wouldn't assume that a 60 yr old philanthropist would laugh at a cartoon of Paris Hilton shoving a pineapple up her chacha.
Those assumptions may make me prejudiced, but I think it's (nearly?) impossible for people build and adapt their social skills through their own life experiences WITHOUT becoming prejudiced in some way or another.
That being said, I think that when you get into what you think people "should" be, it may cross the line from assumption to judgment, which can make things a little bit difficult. Like, I know that *I* was wild and idealistic as a kid, and I know I'm much more responsible and pragmatic now, but I don't think everyone "should" be that way; they should be themselves, and if they surprise me, they surprise me. You know?
I think assumptions, generalizations, and prejudices make life easier in many ways and are therefore relied on by people not wanting to delve into the truth.
Not intended to sound as negative as it sounds ... I assume, generalize and am prejudice because I can't possibly process it all every day.
We just have to be aware that it's the easy way out. Love, Dear Sweet Dad
I think The Onion has summed up everyone's responses quite well in a t-shirt: "Stereotypes are a real time-saver."
So if anyone is looking for any last-minute gifts....
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